Porno for Players

Mia Rose, the porn actress known for a tear-jerking role in Whores of Warcraft, (later renamed to Whorelore - I’m guessing, a change that came about from producers wanting a bigger emphasis on expanding the critically acclaim lore and adding more cunnilingus loot drops) is back parading around on her server after being hit with the ban stick. Word has it, it’s a common practice for the Neanderthals to share the location in public chat to gander Mia’s froofrah. If Mia is nearby to help tell the tale, she will interject with a link to her myspace instead, encouraging fans and foes alike to use that safer hotspot instead. Since this seedy activity breaks all sorts of rules, it attracted a customer service meter maid that discovered the account she uses wasn’t registered in her name prompting them to do their fuckin’ job.

Account termination until further notice is standard procedure; it royally sucks and will cause anyone to plummet into rage and random bouts of craziness. In Mia’s case, I offer no sage chestnuts; all the instruction manuals on common sense were already handed out complete with finger-wagging diagrams. Nor, am I crusading with the Legion of Decent against the so called sinful who win awards like the most amazing pummeling buttsekz of the year. Any person working in the porn industry that enjoys the wondrous odors from fifty flavors of cock or cock-stained ham wallets fuming from their orifices can go on tasting the colorful rainbow. I have no qualms with Mia’s chosen profession, I’ve watched two episodes when the show first “hit-it-big” and they (it’s all about the research people) were hilariously horrible, but I find the attention whoring (which she admits to enjoy) both amusing and annoying. Right or wrong, she had it coming.

I feel slight shame in even popping out of my cave and even acknowledging this dreck, (but it actually feels pretty damn good to string a few sentences together). One last thing before I burrow down and it’s probably the main reason I’m posting in the first place. It’s disappointing that Brian Crecente from Kotaku, whom has some nifty writing chops under his belt, would even address and actually publish some half garbled post about it. How is it newsworthy to the masses that read Kotaku? Something so fucking inane on one of the top gaming blogs - is he fucking insane? Why the hell not, due to the fast food nature that is the blogging world, Crecente’s dime rag has turned to complete hubris over the last year. All that matters is cranking out reams of tripe to meet the post quota. Crecente might as well jack every single drama post from the WoW forums and call it a day.

People love a good scandal, they happily eat this shit up and the hits keep coming - reading the typical news blurbs (look what the devs said about this patch, pubis for elves. Hurray!) or your dkp loot logs (take a look at all the fancy pants that dropped so eat me bitches) is getting more stale as time goes on. Fuck us all, I might as well be watching Big Brother.