Take that WoW, the end is near!

New shiny mmog, beats older shiny is fading mmog, and it’s only the first week! Duh! I’m talking about LotRo dethroning that other you know who juggernaut all the kiddos play. This is breaking news people, I think IGN’s next post should be, “Haaaay you guys at Blizzard, it’s fucking over!” And I would agree! WoW’s downfall is incoming - I six sensed it, when my nipples flare up, I know it is a dead giveaway, it also mutates all three into dangerously super sharp nipple weapons, so freakishly awesome I could carve a full on ATM depiction between Frodo and Sam out of my monitor. I just tried it and I injured half-a-nipple, I’ll insure that part next time.

IGN’s “journalists,” bloggers, hacks, regurgitating cloned automons who have nothing better to do than write filler posts that doomcast WoW, need to not only die in a fire, but in a prison shower at the very same time - learn to multi task bruddah’s. World of Warcraft sold 20 fucking million copies, pre TBC. WoW was unseated for A WEEK, and has been ousted in the past before - Damn those Sims! It’s not a big deal where it has to be your main fucking headline, making it about a duel with WoW without even providing any data is the most fucking inept, asinine, sensationalist bullshit tripe that makes me want to beat a paraplegic donkey until it fucking walks again. Your next shrek, I’m all for product placement - anyone out there selling paraplegic shrek donkeys? Hook up a freebie.

I’m happy for LotRo, I really am - I’m a fan, I preordered, yea, uh-huh, I’m a founder baby and I just watched all three movies in the last week and almost cried when Merry and Pippin almost ran out of some rare Hobbit Weed. It’s the cuntloids at IGN ruining the internet - the only way I can avoid their garbage is tearing out my eyes and scarfing them down my gullet, human sushi is a delicacy. I couldn’t stop there, since I could still hear, I would have to fill up my ears with some rubber cement glue and fill them with colorful chalk. The only other option is destorying the internet and cutting off all ties to my fellow real-life friends who like to shoot the shit about every mmog newsbit, they may be imaginary, but I still hear them! The internet is a neat place, I lost my virginity there - it has some sweet pron you can never get in any magazines, ever. Enough is enough, it’s time I worked on my why Vanguard sucks blurb. If you can’t beat em up with words, I might as well join them.